Today I learned (courtesy of my dog) that there are only two genders in the world—the humper and the humpee.

Mainstream but song!

And don't get it wrong lol just bc I'm here less doesn't mean it's any better. If anything I feel worse lolol but the weekend was ok I bought myself a lot of food. My package from Watsons also arrived. Today Bebu started eating her food again fucking finally di ba!

I still feel useless at work I don't see the point in what I do. Joke I SEE THE POINT I SEE THE VALUE I KNOW THE IMPORTANCE LIKE A GRADES SCHOOLER but do I feel any sense of accomplishment? No lol I feel like the weakest link and I'm always on the lookout if I'd still have a job the week after bc I don't feel like I'm being productive hahahahha I love the people I really appreciate my boss but I think I'm failing her. And it's not like I'm not giving my best everyday. I am. But it doesn't feel enough. I don't think I'm doing enough. 

I miss the times when I was productive and I knew it and I was so sure that I was and nobody could question it. I could defend myself to anyone and I knew what I was doing bc I was sure of the value and the quality of work I put out. Now I feel like crap wahahhahahaha I also didn't enrol or go to school like I was supposed to on Monday. I messaged the person I was going w on Sunday and never heard back. Decided to sleep at 9am Monday since the appt was supposed to be for 11am and I know I could've just gone alone but I couldn't bring myself to do it so I didn't mind the company. Anyway they messaged me at 10am lol so yeah I dont like that lol

 Anw next time I set an appointment I'm goin with or without this person

Call me a sad girl for all I care but I have nothing to live for anw today was productive I dropped off my laundry changed my sheets gave my dog a bath gnite 

 I'm still fine w the idea of getting run over by a truck but I'd prefer a painless death please thanks

Why is finding true love so hard haha I'm not looking for it but like why doesn't it happen for me I'm kidding I know why I don't deserve it I mean the person I am right now  would most likely just fuck up even the best person for me so yeah it's ok I don't think I can handle anything else aside from my dog so that's ok

Love means letting someone in my life and making them part of my routine I don't rly want that esp since I'm lazy HAHAHAH i mean what routine am I even talking abt for starters lmao and my I'm rly insecure abt my family background and I'm also still insecure abt myself wahahahha and no external reassurance can fix this so if u know me in real life don't bother. In case u care. I already appreciate the thought. But save ur breath. I hope I feel better. I hope I feel better about myself too.

La lang hirap lang kalaban sarili wahaha

I love my bed and browsing my phone so much I wonder if I'd ever find a reason again to do something aside from sleeping the entire weekend away bahaha. Can't believe I used to have a social life

How did my social battery go this low

Sometimes I wonder if it's right to isolate myself this much but to be fair even if I didn't do this i don't rly have a lot of available frjends so it's better to do nothing than anticipate brain rot brain fart brain fart I'm just saying randlm stuff not sure if any of theseare still making sense my eyes are swollen 

U know sometimes I think I might have ADHD wahahaha but ofc we don't self diagnose in this house I'm so thirsty

For someone who fucks up so often on a lot of things I REALIZED I MAY HAVE PERFECTIONISTIC TENDENCIES LOL THATS WHY ID RATHER NOT TRY AND THEN FAIL THAN GIVE IT MY ALL AND STILL FAIL WAHAHAHA