yucks. i did not stay chill the entire year just to end up in this same spot. i keep on wanting to bang my head against the wall every minute of the day. ive reflected on what ive done, and im fully aware it was disgusting. im just lucky they're nice about it, but that still does not take away how i ended up becoming like the people i disliked. yucks.
im lucky to have my friends who tell it as it is. they keep me grounded. i just need to listen. self-control, babes. self-control.
in other news, ive been feeling like shit lately, and i have a feeling im gonna crash again :))))))))))))) so i went and reached out to a friend who lives close by and we hung out for a bit. coffee also worked. maybe im gonna take a bath today. i havent done so for 3 days now. haha. i cannot function. :)))) <3 ive also been drinking at work lately which is of course, BAD, but i put an end to that drinking streak today.
i cant have friends. i think it's best to keep to myself.