I'm tired.

Naisip ko kanina it would be nice if SO could pay me a compliment that would actually count for something, but then, it's that he doesn't do it too often that gives weight to the times when he finally does. And don't start with me on how external validation is unnecessary when you have a solid sense of self, because nothing is making sense right now.

Or from anyone, really. And I don't want to hear anything about being strong, because it's not like there's anything exceptional about my strength you all oh so rave about. It's no different from everyone else trying to get through the day. Or about being smart or being pretty, with the mandatory add-on "just not by conventional standards" because I know what I'm not and that's the thing, I know too much about what I'm not. I'm not lazy when I compliment and try my hardest to personalize so it comes across to the receiver that it was solely intended for them. I deserve just as much. 

But idk. I'm just in need of some sort of upper, and of the healthy kind. 

I've been toying with a certain idea right now, but idk. [Update: Nope, I'm sure about this]

Here's the song I've been obsessed with recently. 

Have two more for good measure. 

And I'm back at it hahahaha