Wednesday, August 19, 2020

I'm just a little person,

One person in a sea

Of many little people

Who are not aware of me.


I do my little job

And live my little life,

Eat my little meals,

Miss my little kid and wife


And somewhere, maybe someday,

Maybe somewhere far away,

I'll find a second little person

Who will look at me and say:


"I know you.

You're the one I've waited for.

Let's have some fun."


Life is precious every minute,

And more precious with you in it,

So let's have some fun


We'll take a road trip way out west.

You're the one I like the best.

I'm glad I've found you,

Like being around you

You're the one I like the best.


Somewhere, maybe someday,

Maybe somewhere far away,

I'll meet a second little person

And we'll go out and play.


—Jon Brion, Little Person


Here are my favorite bits from Charlie Kaufman's "Synecdoche, New York": 





I need to rewatch this... Fuck. Just the analyses about the movie is making me feel so much and giving me goosebumps. 

We're so fixated in our own misery that we're letting life pass us by. We're too dead set in  looking for our purpose in life or creating something that we hope might change the world,  that we miss out on the oppotunities to do so, to do good to those around us. 

I... don't know how to be good to others. I'm aware I'm a very selfish person. I want to be helpful to the people I care about, but I don't think there's anything of me that I could give. No tthat I think there'd be anything of use. Ha!

Right now, I'm getting this urge to pack up and just leave. I don't want to be here anymore. I want to be in a place where no one knows me, where I can get a clean slate and start fresh. Maybe reinvent myself, get another shot to become the kind of person I would like. 

Since when was Michael Johnson's "I'll Always Love You" this slow... Will I ever write again?