I feel like shit. Didn't realize until after na 3 hrs na pala ako nakatunganga. I don't feel real. Sorry no songi

I feel numb floaty kinda thinking of killing myself too but I'm doing my best to be reasonable. Wala pa akong panglibing di pa pwede. Boy do I wanna die tho.

I don't hate anything or anyone, maybe just myself. I'm just tired and so fed up of everything :)

I hope your side of the planet is treating you well at least despite the shitfest that the world has been lately. 

It feels pointless to tell friends about how I feel. I feel so disconnected already. I take a look at the list of friends I have, and I can't find anyone I'd want to reach out to. Idk why. It's not that I don't trust them, it's that... idk.

I know that I am loved. I know my friends love me. But I can't find it in me to tell them this kind of things anymore. I don't want to waste their time. I feel like a burden. 

Can the world be a little bit gentler? Can the days be a little bit kinder? Can my brain be a little nicer??

I've always hoped for the kinder tomorrows that a friend once said would come my way eventually, and here they are now, but is this really the kindest they'll ever be?

Why does it still hurt so much? 

One reading I got last time called out how I ave this unproductive tendency to isolate from people, and it was just recently that I've stopped being in denial that I have been, indeed, putting myself in this self-imposed isolation. 

I want to break out of it, you know? It's just that it feels like there is no world to welcome me back. 

And this frustrates me which only makes me want to isolate even more and disconnect from the already few people that I still have left on my side idk haha 

So eto 9 na, 4 hrs kulang-kulang na ako nagmumunimuni :) wan ko

I wish I could afford therapy right now. 

Trying my hardest to keep from bleaching and dyeing my hair 

I still ended up finding a song for you anyway lol ilang oras ka ba naman tumunganga 

Here.